I'm feeling a little sorry for myself and I think it's affected my writing. By this I mean to say, I have a dear friend who is in hospice and who is dying of cancer at 31, I have a parent going into another stretch of yet another battle with cancer as well, I have, somehow, managed to get diagnosed with bronchitis on the day when New York has a heat index of 119. Now, all I want to do is lay under a bus, and I can't seem to get writing (which usually helps when life is too big).
So, when I was kid and things were upsetting, my favorite junk food was Hungry Man Fried Chicken dinner. With the corn and mashed potatoes, then lots and lots of coffee ice cream later.
Of course, I wanted to get those things on the way home, but I settled for some hummus, crackers, and papaya. Too healthy, I know, but it's too hot for the oven and fried chicken anyway.
ANYWAY, all this to say, how does one start writing when really BIG things are going on? Do you know what I mean, like when you're heart is really broken you can't seem to write at all until you get a little better? Or when someone close to you dies, you can't really write about until some time has passed. BUT, you can't really write about anything else, right? I mean all the things you want to write about that aren't the big things seem stupid and mundane and unimportant.
So, I guess this is it, I'll just reminisce about Hungry Man Fried Chicken Dinner and Solid Gold (oh, did I mention I loved Solid Gold).
4 comments:
That's pretty much the only time I can write. When things are peachy, I don't write much at all.
Hope you're well.
hope you are feeling better, ada. i'm coming to your reading next wk! ps. i *looove* solid gold.
--aimee
Hi Ada
I got pneumonia in the summer once.
It's frustrating because we're supposed to get sick in the winter, right?
Anyway, I think all the little mundane things we want to say about someone when they're sick are just as important as the grand things we say after they're gone. It's a way of cataloging them for our memories, I think.
Hope you're better soon
I think you're right. My friend past away on Sunday and in some ways I think it was good that she could finally stop fighting. I'm feeling better, but still feel like the world is crumbling. I guess, bronchitis can make you kind of depressed. Let's pray for a good-hearted full moon tomorrow night!
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